Recently, the puzzling question in my mind is why I would ever want to settle for less than what I deserve or less than what I want. I reached a point in my life where I thought to myself, “Is this the kind of life I REALLY want to live? Is this the kind of life I really deserve?”
Now, the question becomes why do people settle? I firmly believe that everyone who is reading this blog deserves a breathtaking life full of passion and excitement. Yes, YOU.
I think that people settle because it’s easier to keep their expectations low to avoid getting hurt or rejected. Because, the truth is rejection sucks. Not just when you are 8 and get picked last for the kickball team, but when you are a grown up and don’t get the job you want or maybe when your 21 and you get broken up with. Rejection continues your entire life, and unfortunately it never gets easier.
I hate to admit it, but I recently found myself as a settler. When I first realized that my life was on a path of boring same old going to work, coming home, doing more work, and not having much of anything else, I knew I needed to make a change. Was I settling? I could not be a settler! I am (or I like to think of myself as an) exciting person. When did I become a settler? I wanted to be a “doer” so to speak. I had learned the hard way that life was too short to sit around wasting it away.
So, why do people settle? I am a poster child for thinking I don’t deserve something great. It’s okay to think that. I mean it’s not because EVERY BODY DESERVES SOMETHING GREAT. Though, I feel like I can say it is normal that a lot of people feel they don’t deserve something “great.” You find yourself making excuses of why it’s okay to settle, or why you deserve what you already have. I, myself, always want everything to work out how I have it planned inside my head. I constantly overlook things, ignore red flags, and make excuses because I want to continue with the plan. Not anymore. When I realized that I do in fact deserve a life that is electrifying, I changed.
None of you should settle for a boy, a girl, a career or a life for that matter. Will you at one point in your life? Probably. Have I? Yes. I know it’s hard. It’s really damn hard. You make excuses. You try to justify for a person, for yourself. Don’t lose yourself in trying to settle for something less than you deserve.
If it’s a relationship, tell yourself that you are fucking catch. I’m serious, I know you are laughing but it’s what I tell all of my girlfriends. But, it’s the truth. You are a fucking catch. If you don’t think you can tell yourself that, I WILL. *Sorry if I offended anyone with my f bomb*
If you feel like you are settling in a career and you are unhappy, find a part of it that will make you happy or start looking for something that will make you happy. There was a point in my career where I questioned if what I was doing was the correct path for me. Was I settling? Was I meant to teach? I searched for answers for two months and while I am not certain I will stick with straight teaching forever, I do believe that I found parts of it that have confirmed I meant to work in the field of education. It is okay to question if you are settling. I can honestly say it helped me fall in love all over again with my career.
Each and every one of you reading this has a beautiful soul and I know that because you got this link because you know me or knows someone who knows me. You are smart. You deserve to be happy. You deserve the best. You deserve to NOT to settle.